Winnie The Pooh

My granddaughter has requested I don my Winnie the Pooh costume again this year to escort her around the neighborhood trick or treating.  Since I am a loving grandmother and would never dream of disappointing her, I have once again dug out the costume.

Recently I came across Pooh's Little Instruction Book.  Since I am going to portray Pooh, I thought it might be beneficial to read the small book.  This is what I learned:

"If possible, try to find a way to come downstairs that doesn't involve going bump, bump, bump, on the back of your head."  Very good advice indeed!

"Try not to sit down on thistles; it takes all of the life out of them.  Besides, someone might have planned on eating them for lunch."  I find thistles to be a bit too stickery for eating but perhaps Eeoyre does not.

"If you secretly get into a kangaroo's pocket and she begins to jump away, be prepared for a bumpy ride."  Now that sounds like fun!

"When having a smackerel of something with a friend, don't eat so much that you get stuck in the doorway trying to get out."  But isn't it impolite to turn down a perfectly good smackerel?

"When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it."  So perhaps it is best not to waste so much gray fluff thinking of all those things.

"When going round a spinney of larch trees tracking something, be sure it isn't your own footprints you are following."  Yes, sadly I have been known to get lost going to visit my father. 
"Before floating up into the sky with a  balloon in search of honey, make sure the bees you are looking for are the right sort of bees."  And all this time I thought everyone was good, kind and loving and of course wanted to share their honey with me.

"People who don't think probably don't have brains; rather, they have grey fluff that's blown into their heads by mistake."  And grey fluff is hard to come by so must not be wasted on trivial thinking.

"If you think you see a Heffalump in a trap make sure it isn't really a Bear with an empty jar of honey stuck on his head."  Oooops, do I need my eyes checked?

"If you are looking for Home and find instead a sand-pit, try looking for a sand-pit.  Then you'd be sure not to find it, which would be a Good Thing, because you might find something that you weren't looking for which might be just what you were looking for."  It is also a very good way to begin a new adventure.

"Tiggers can climb trees. Of course, there's the coming down too, which is difficult, unless one falls, in which case it is .....easy."  Been there, done that.  Now it is my honor and pleasure to teach my grandson how to climb trees.

For a Bear with Very Little Brain, Pooh seems to be a smart little guy;  but then I may think that because I can relate to the predicaments Pooh gets himself into.   I wonder what would happen if I had a CAT scan?  Would a brain be found or just gray fluff?  My family would probably tell you fluff.